As it comes to a close..

So there are precisely 13 working days left for me this year. I can't tell you how eager I am to just have my mind take a break from everything - and that generally comes about, when there are no obligations left. We still have our dance show coming up on the 6th of December. Super keen for that. But until such time, it's waking up with an alarm, trying to exude some form of positivity in order to get through it (as the time can drag) and counting down the days really.... There's another countdown on, which ties in with the end of work as well.. and it's the countdown to reach the goal weight that I'm keen to be for Summer and well essentially as long as possible, with the right amount of fitness and good eating. I am well aware of the fact that we are going into the 'festive' season and that means a lot of feel good eating is gonna be going down. But then all the more reason why one should go into it fit and ready, so that it's not some unimaginable task in the new year. Anyway, let me pause now to say that it's going well... so far. And as all things go, dedication is key. Doesn't help when every day for the last 2 weeks have been mid winter vibe days... Not conducive to good eating. Makes you do crazy things like eat a pancake! Hahaha, well, all the food and fitness talk aside, life is ok... in an aesthetically distant sort of way. So keep on keeping on is the idea.............

Black Tuesday

The passing of the secrecy Bill would mark the beginning of the end of the freedom and is most likely to be passed today....

So wear black today to show you're against the secrecy bill... or if your mood just matches it... Whichever makes you comfortable... Coincidentally, it's the colour I'm wearing. 

Monday..

It's the weekeeeeeeeend baby! Fuck yeah! :) :) :)

Is everyone, but me, insanely happy? I'm sorry, but every status I read, is "Sooooo excited for this weekend!" or "Soooo excited to see my boyfriend later" or "Friday, yaaaaaaaay" Are these people on a chronic dose of prozac or are do they really just lead such perfect lives, that every remotely cool thing, becomes the BEST thing in the entire WORLD to happen EVER! And it's happening THIS WEEKEND!! Wow.. Clearly I categorize my emotions better, or my life sucks. I wonder which one it is.. Maybe a bit of both. Whatever. I'm going to have a somewhat cool weekend, but its not scream-it-from-the-rooftops-amazing... though I bet it might even be more fulfilling than those who are screaming out loud all over their statuses. But I guess, that's their way of telling themselves that cool things are happening for them, when in fact they're just kinda average things really. Or 'normal' things. Like getting overexcited coz it's Friday, oh my word, you'll never slip into manic depression, coz every Friday (even if you're having shitty days prior to it) you are overwhelmed with supreme joy! It's fascinating for you, I'm so excited for you right now. Monday- Thursday's issues go into Pandora's box until Monday returns. That's incredible. I wonder if I start doing that if I'll start to believe that amazing things are happening too, or if the people who really know me will think I've lost my mind, and consequently offer me some advice for the reason behind my 'obvious' overcompensation of emotions.. well that, or some of their prozac.

Human beings = strange.

When it rains, it pours

God, I hate that saying, mainly because of how true it actually is. I was thinking to myself just yesterday (whilst taking a timeout from my day) why as we get older we handle our issues differently. And by saying that I don’t mean we handle it in a more mature way than before, that’s a completely different thing – and as we are older, I would hope we do handle them with more maturity than before. But instead I mean, before if you were having a nightmare of day, nothing was going right and it literally felt like the walls were closing in on you.... the only thing you want to do is call up a friend to go hang out with at the end of the day and listen to their day, or talk crap about nothing important and just forget your troubles for some time, so that you can relax, remain sane and regroup basically. These days when you have a day like that, it is difficult to face anyone or anything. Not talking to anyone, seeing no one and instead – retreating to your very quiet home to just be alone is all that you feel like. Honestly... I don’t even want to talk about the issues, I don’t want advice on them (unless of course you can solve them – then jump right in.... Please!) and I certainly don’t know how to pretend that they’re not there by being around someone else. So I suppose the thought that crossed my mind was whether we just have less energy these days to pretend nothing’s wrong and look for that escape in going somewhere with someone to forget about them, or whether the problems we face are just bigger or more important that you actually can’t ignore them? It’s quite impossible to? I’m starting to think it’s the latter, just because I don’t think there’s comfort in forgetting something that hasn’t been resolved, you can’t hide it away in your mind til later because it’s too important to not think about. Whereas having a bad day, when that’s all it’s been – crabby customers, late for work, spilled coffee on yourself, that type of thing you can escape from at the end of the day by actually being around a happy face and forgetting about the day, coz it’s in the past. I can only hope the downpour of yesterday will slowly start to dry up and things can go back to normal again. And my normal I simply mean the normal I’m used to dealing with. 

That's what I said!

Say cheese

Ok, So I don't even recall whether I have mentioned my new toy... the Nikon D70 SLR. Bought for the purpose of, erm, taking photos, haha, and well mainly for the fact that I would like to have a decent camera for my trip overseas next year. (that, I have mentioned) Well I decided to start playing around and seeing how complex an SLR vs a simple point and shoot is. At first I didn't want to do a thing without a manual, or a living and breathing manual, with whom I might have more patience. (I don't do reading instructions very well) Anywaaaay, seeing as though I was anxious to just get started on my own, I figured what the hell and started snapping. I have plenty to learn, very keen to as well, so let's see how it progresses I guess. I've created a new page under my list of pages on the right, check it out if you want. Hoping there's potential for some good ones. Anyway, just another thing I'm into.. so it's more for fun than anything else.

Don't know that I have a pic of me on my blog.. hahaha, odd I guess? I don't know. But here is the face behind the cam.. well.... some of it ;)

word of the day

pre·vail

Verb:

To prove more powerful than opposing forces; be victorious: "it is hard for logic to prevail over emotion".

How convenient..

Old people will do and say what they want because they can get away with it.... 'Ah don't stress about him, he's old... he has no idea what he's doing or saying.' Or 'don't let it get to you, he's old, he didn't mean it.' Do some people (that aren't old enough to qualify for this excuse) do the same? Act stupid so as to be able to get away with things? It's easier isn't it? Pretend that you don't get it... and that is forever your defense. To the point that no one gives those type of people a hard time anymore because 'he's like that'... hmmmmm, I wonder sometimes.. This could turn into quite a story if I get into it. But I don't feel like it right now. Also I haven't blogged in a while, as pressing work issues have been occupying my time and thoughts. And I am sure to return with plenty....(Annoyed zone = blog zone) But some things are quite hard to resist the urge to mention. But again, no need to carry on. Just think it's true of some, not-old people to carry this trait.

4 in 4

And so the internal challenge begins.... time to trim the fat.... literally..

Oh and Happy Halloween - apparently is custom to celebrate this holiday here even though it holds no bearing to South Africa or Africa for that matter. But it's fun to dress up and eat sweets. So why the hell not? ...I guess was the idea behind it...

Carz coz I can

Jaywalking

I'd like to know where I can apply for a permit to take out a certain amount of jaywalkers a month. Anyone? Jaywalking should be illegal. Walk to the friggin pedestrian you stupid moron!!!!! And if you can't find one.... its probably not safe to cross there.... Imagine that notion? Can't? Doesn't surprise me. When you cross the road you have to keep travelling the way you were travelling before you crossed it anyway... So why not just do it on the side you're on until you reach a part where jaywalking becomes walking... and I won't hit you.

Hanging Like a Cheap suit

I don't get it... why would you want to wake up with a hangover...? (Assuming you're not 18 and just discovered booze) Here's the even stranger part... Why would you want to wake up with a hangover on a Monday of all days? Also, why does it make sense for say a 35-year old to wake up fresh every day for work coz he takes it seriously, and well because it's normal to be fresh for work, but a 25-year old - if he isn't coming to work hungover sometimes on a Monday or a Friday or a whatever day coz he chose not to get drunk randomly a day before he had a job to do, why is he deemed boring? Or not living? Or becoming old before he age? Surely if you work, no matter your age or demographic or any other the above, we are all expected to perform at the same levels as the rest, which is - to the best of our ability in general? Not the best of our ability on that particular day, otherwise everything would be done half-arsed I imagine. I just don't really get it. There are 2 nights a week where you can lose your mind, your underwear and your car if you felt like that was part of 'living', namely Friday and Saturday. But people still think that random midweek partying and Sunday deck partying is the way to spend your remaining leisure time from the working week. I think then as I look back at yesterday and the way I spent it, with friends and music and cool conversations and laughs (for bizarre reasons at times) There weren't hundreds of people, there wasn't a DJ - 'Yet Ag-en was on stage - which I've started to understand the meaning of behind their name now, and as opposed to a deck there were Moroccan style cushions and pillows everywhere to chill. I guess some would debate as to which set up is better, but if you had to ask me about the details of any moment of the day vs someone at the OC of their recollection of all their moments on the Sunday, I'm pretty sure, mine was way more 'memorable' in all meanings of the word. So when I see statuses on my phone of people I know saying how sick they feel today... I can only laugh, coz I wonder whether it was worth it? Problem is I don't think they even remember if it was...

My Favourite

I think it's funny how even though we have our favourite song on our pc's, ipods and cd's... we still get so excited when it starts to play on the radio.. and we turn it up and smile like we'll never hear it anywhere but there...

I also think when it comes to songs, the word 'favourite' doesn't hold it's true meaning... I have many 'favourites' :)

Get over yourself

When I need to stop driving in the road, on which I have right of way (given that it's an effing road and I am in an effing car), so that you came aimlessly idle across the road at your own speed with your gaze in another direction of that my car coming up behind you...I literally want to ride you over. You know those movies where people imagine out how they'd do it and you believe that's what's happening and then it switches back to him sitting in the car just watching the moron cross the road and rather being patient, because, well, prison apparently isnt very comfortable. I do think if I chose to ride him over - that's where I might end up. Anyway, I noticed the chip on his shoulder and decided it wasn't worth it, so at the risk of whatever could possibly go wrong I decided to approach him slowly anyway as he got to the other side of the road and leer at him as if to say, 'you're lucky you made it!' Hahahaahaha. Arrrrg annoying driving stories... Get over yourself.... look where you're walking, hurry across a road where cars literally are trying to drive, even better yet, find a goddam pedestrian crossing!! Imagine that... cars will stop, and happily so.... not almost take you out whilst you're on your way to... um, probably nowhere important anyway.

weird funny

Life: 101

I think it's so strange how we're all meant to live life the 'right' way, and yet with over 6.5 billion people in the world... we're all living it so differently from the next. Simply put - we are all trying to figure out the meaning of life (Riddle of the -, um..... infinity) and while I actually only mean 50%, because 50% don't care to figure it out, aren't smart enough to think in those dimensions, or otherwise believe they have in fact figured it out and are ok with how they're doing it, I am still concerned that a certain majority hasn't risen like a phoenix from the ashes with the 'right' way. Sure you'll get guru's and you'll watch Eat, Pray, Love and read books that explain what the right way is... and I'm sure somewhere far away in India with their fruit diets and no need for sleep and roaming around tranquil gardens with flowing waters and pretty insects - they are 100% convinced that that is what life is essentially about. But my question is... if we all decided one morning to live the guru life, would we end up stuck in an era? There'd be no future developments, almost no going forward as such. Ambition and desires would fall away, as we would want for nothing other than the simple-worldly things that we are blessed with.. water, food from the ground and ultimately inner peace. Seriously!?!!? So I say ok, we can't all live the same... if everyone lived in exactly the same fashion as everyone else.. well I can't even fathom the word that might describe what life would be like.. Too much of one thing can't be good. It doesn't really make sense I think. I guess what I'm trying to say is... aren't we all playing our own individual parts in contributing to living it the 'right' way by doing it differently?

It's been a while - NO shit!

I love how when you don't hear from someone for a long time and then you decide to contact them to see how they are, (as you do every time) coz for some reason it crossed your mind that its been a while.... It's always an acceptable response to say: "Sorry! Ive just been sooooo busy" It's like if you can bullshit a person by making them believe that their life is 24/7 work, then surely that is a good enough apology because, well... it's work?! Then you get the people who you call when you haven't heard from them in a long time, and they don't even give an excuse OR an apology, in fact it's the most random bullshit conversation in the world. That one where people don't know what to say, so they say: "We must get together some time" And you probably never ever see them again. You might bump into them in a shop and at that point they awkwardly dodge you, so as to avoid the same Bullshit conversation. Anyway.... Make an effort.. all I'm saying....